Sunday, June 5, 2011

dethroned

I thought that I was the queen bee when it comes to E. I thought that I was the apple of his eye. Given that I gave birth to him and all (and destroyed my figure in the process) I foolishly assumed that I would always be his "go to". You know, anytime there is a boo-boo or he's scared or he needs a reassuring snuggle, I'd be top pick.

Seems I have been dethroned by my husband!

We've had a couple of little incidents here recently where E very deliberately wanted his dada instead of me. What a blow to my ego! I couldn't help but feel a little hurt, even though I know it's completely irrational! When I saw my little guy's arms go flying in the direction of dad, I was crushed. My comfort wasn't good enough. Daddy reigned superior.

Please tell me someone else can relate? I'm not crazy, am I?

I hope you know that I am writing this with a bittersweet chuckle. I am grateful that my husband spends copious amounts of time parenting - far more than most dads I know. And E reaps all the benefits of a loving, trusting relationship with his dad. They have a special connection. E looks to his papa for security and love. It is the most precious thing to watch my boys together. I don't care if it sounds cliche - it really does melt my heart.

For us, it's far better for us to divide the labor, so to speak, when it comes to E. Since the initial couple of tough months when he was born we've gradually gotten better and better with this. I am sure this is why E is so close with each of us. My husband trusts me to do my best, and I trust him to do the same. I don't step in and tell him how to be a dad, and he doesn't tell me how to be a mom. We each do our parenting in our own way. It feels just perfect, exactly as it should be.

So don't take my silly complaint serious, okay? I'm glad that daddy is the hero sometimes. To me, this is how it should be - a shared throne. As long as my boys remember who the queen bee is around here, we'll be just fine!

1 comment:

  1. I was SO jealous when my son started going to his dad over me. And it happened at a time when I was almost overwhelmed with how much he was a mama's boy so I thought I would welcome the switch, which came right around when my son was E's age.

    But it was just a phase and it didn't last long at all and I was number 1 again after a few months. And I'm still number one. Which has it's perks but I could use a break again!

    ReplyDelete

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Yes, peas are delicious - and funny!

Yes, peas are delicious - and funny!
Our little guy at 15 months, February 2011.